春晓是五言绝句吗 孟浩然的五言绝句《春晓》

2023-10-19 08:03   geyange.com

春晓是五言绝句吗

行业动态 > 孟浩然的五言绝句《春晓》

孟浩然的五言绝句《春晓》

这是古时儿童学诗、现代儿童学写字的最好读物,北京翻译公司告诉您:它明白、通俗、上口、好记,很像民歌或“顺口溜”。孟浩然( 689 -- 740 )是唐代一位“平民”诗人,没有做过官。这首诗像李白的《静夜思》(“床前明月光”)一样,我自己小时候就会背诵,后来我用它教授过我的儿女以及他们的儿女。这首诗,好就好在它像“顺口溜”,翻译难就难在译文也应该是“顺口溜”。现在请对比着重讨论它的多种英语译文:

春晓

孟浩然

春眠不觉晓,

处处闻啼鸟;

夜来风雨声,

花落知多少!

译文一( W. Bynner 与江亢虎合译)

A Spring Morning

By Meng Haoran

I awake light-hearted this morning of spring,

Everywhere round me the singing of birds---

But now I remember the night, the storm,

And I wonder how many blossoms were broken.

译文二(许渊冲译)

A Spring Morning

By Meng Haoran

This morning of spring in bed I’m lying.

Not woke up till I hear birds crying.

After a night of wind and showers

How many are the fallen flowers?

译文三(载郭着章、傅惠生编《千家诗》英汉对照)

The Spring Dawn

Slumbering, I know not the spring dawn is peeping.

But everywhere the singing birds are cheeping.

Last night I heard the rain dripping and the wind weeping.

How many petals were now on the ground sleeping.

译文四(张廷琛 chen魏博思合译)

Spring Dawn

Oversleeping in spring I missed the dawn;

Now everywhere the cries of birds are heard.

Tumult of wind and rain had filled the night---

How many blossoms fell during the storm?

译文五(孙大雨译)

Spring Dawn

Feeling not when cometh th’ peep of spring dawn,

Everywhere birds’ songs I hear in my slumber,

Through the sounds of wind and rain all th’ night long,

Know I not how many th’ flowers fall in number.

译文六(龚景浩译)

Spring Morn

Spring slumber goes on and on.

Everywhere you hear bird’s song.

Last night there was wind and rain.

How many flowers in mud have lain!

以上译文请大家欣赏评论。

(二)

现在回头进一步讨论诗的意境以及读者(首先是译者)如何对原作意境的理解问题。

孟浩然《春晓》的第一句“春眠不觉晓”,过去总觉得作者有什么“言外之意”,总想从“春夏秋冬”四季的自然差别去体察原作这句话的用意,但总没有得出令自己满意的答案。首先,作者为何不说“夏眠”、“秋眠”、或者“东眠”呢?又为何说“春眠不觉晓”呢?除了春天是充满希望的播种季节,“春风送暖”、“大地回春”、“鸟语花香”等自然因素,苏轼在《春宵》写的那种意境与人为因素,可能更起作用吧!其次,“不觉”是什么意思呢?显然是因为睡得舒服、甚至香甜才“不觉”得天已破“晓”或大亮了,虽然夜里有风雨,但“夜来风雨声”,作者“我”可能由于酣睡没有听到,即使在入睡前就已经刮风下雨,但“风雨声”也没能干扰或阻止作者“我”进入甜蜜的梦乡。天亮醒来后耳边是一片鸟叫声(“处处闻啼鸟”),一般情况下,对心情舒畅的“我”来说,特别是在“春天”,应该是“欢叫”而不是“啼哭”,是春光里“鸟的歌唱”,而不是秋风中“鸟的哀鸣”。但在特殊的情况下,如果作者“我”见景生情,从“夜来风雨声”叹息与伤感百花过早地被摧残,感叹人生与爱情的脆弱,那么他刚醒来时的高兴心情一扫而光,似乎鸟的叫声也都充满了悲伤。看来正是译者对原作的意境有不同的理解与联想,导致了不同的译文。比如译文一( W. Bynner 与江亢虎合译)添加了 light-hearted (心情轻松),把“啼鸟”译成 the singing of birds ;译文二(许渊冲译)把“闻啼鸟”译成 I hear birds crying. ;译文三(张廷琛( chen )、魏博思译)也用 the cries 来表示鸟的哀鸣;译文四(郭着章、傅惠生编《千家诗》)是 the singing birds are cheeping “歌唱的鸟儿唧唧叫”,第一行开头还用了现在分词 Slumbering (安睡),以表示“不觉晓”的原因;译文五(孙大雨译)也用了介词短语 in my slumber (在安睡中),而且还是 Everywhere birds’ songs I hear in my slumber (在安睡中我到处听见鸟的歌声);译文六(龚景浩译)也用了 slumber (安睡),但注意到这种思想逻辑的错误,把“我听见”换成了“你听见”: Spring slumber goes on and on. Everywhere you hear bird’s song.

;译文四、五、六既然都加添了“安睡”之类意思,也就相应地都把“啼鸟”理解为“鸟的歌唱”了。(译文四是 singing birds ;译文五与六是 bird’s song )

(三)逐句对比

如果对比这几种译文的头两行(或句),只要转译成白话(我有意一律“直译”),其诗情与意境上的差别就更明显了。请看:

译文一(W. Bynner与江亢虎合译):英文似应在me 后加is或is heard。

I awake light-hearted this morning of spring,

Everywhere round me the singing of birds---

这个春天的早晨,我心情轻松地醒来,

我四周到处是鸟的歌唱。

译文二(许渊冲译):许老对 till 一词的用法待商榷。(详后)

This morning of spring in bed I’m lying.

Not woke up till I hear birds crying.

今天这个春天的早晨,我躺在床上。

我没有醒来,直到听见鸟的叫声。

译文三(载郭着章、傅惠生编《千家诗》英汉对照):英语这里似宜把but改为and。

Slumbering, I know not the spring dawn is peeping.

But everywhere the singing birds are cheeping.

我安睡着,不知道春光微微露出。

但到处,歌唱的小鸟在唧唧地叫。

译文四(张廷琛chen魏博思合译):missed一词似欠妥,而“错过了黎明破晓”似不合事理,除非必需“黎明即起”,谁还怕“错过破晓”!

Oversleeping in spring I missed the dawn;

Now everywhere the cries of birds are heard.

在春天我睡过了,错过了黎明破晓; (

现在到处有鸟的啼叫声可以听到。

译文五(孙大雨译):孙老似乎不必用莎士比亚时代的语言。特别是定冠词th’的这种省略形式。

Feeling not when cometh th’ peep of spring dawn,

Everywhere birds’ songs I hear in my slumber,

我未感到何时春天的拂晓到来,

在酣睡中听到到处有鸟在歌唱。

译文六(龚景浩译):译文清新、洗练、简短,但bird’s song似宜改为孙老译的birds’ songs。

Spring slumber goes on and on.

Everywhere you hear bird’s song.

下面再按上述顺序对比诗的后两句(或行)译文:

译文一( W. Bynner 与江亢虎合译)

But now I remember the night, the storm,

And I wonder how many blossoms were broken.

但现在我记得夜里的暴风雨,

我不知道多少花被打坏。

译文二(许渊冲译)

After a night of wind and showers

How many are the fallen flowers?

一夜风雨过后(一夜的风和阵雨过后)

多少花落了?(有多少落下的花?)

译文三(载郭着章、傅惠生编《千家诗》英汉对照)

Last night I heard the rain dripping and the wind weeping.

How many petals were now on the ground sleeping.

(原文四行以四个分词押韵,都以句号结尾。如果是疑问句,似宜用问号,如果是感叹句,宜用惊叹号。)

昨夜我听见雨的滴答(声)和风的哭泣(声)。

现在有多少花瓣在地上哭泣?(没有按原文用句号。)

译文四(张廷琛chen魏博思合译)

Tumult of wind and rain had filled the night---

How many blossoms fell during the storm?

风和雨的喧闹充满夜晚,

多少花在暴风雨里掉落?

(过去完成had filled似宜改成一般过去式filled;疑问句的谓语fell似应用did fall。)

译文五(孙大雨译)

Through the sounds of wind and rain all th’ night long,

Know I not how many th’ flowers fall in number.

译文六(龚景浩译)

Last night there was wind and rain.

How many flowers in mud have lain!

(为了押韵,难免因辞害意。花刚落,不可能就被踩在泥土里。)

总之,译者对原作,特别是诗,可能也容许有不同的理解。但哪一种理解和译文更合适,还是有大体固定的标准,我认为翻译中还是要遵循信、达、雅三位一体的基本原则。当然,每位译者都可能认为自己的译文更好(否则就不“重译”了),因此具体的评论只好留待众人评说,因为任何个人也难有这样的能力、胆量和资格!实事求是地说,英语是外语的中国译者(当然我也包括在内),翻译中随时都会遇到语言问题,出现语言错误不足为怪;我有关的评论也肯定有错或不妥,欢迎批评指正。

(四)

这里我想就许老的两句译文向许老或许明同志,或其他专家请教:

This morning of spring in bed I’m lying.

Not woke up till I hear birds crying.

我觉得英文欠通顺,思想逻辑上似有问题。按先生的这两句译文想象或推测:诗的作者“我”醒来后现在仍然“躺在床上”,回忆刚才(或早就)醒来时的情景:是“鸟的啼叫”把“我”闹醒来的。(这里自然要用过去式动词heard。)但这跟原作“春眠不觉晓”的意境不符,也许是先生有意如此,借此反映老人们常有的夜里做梦的半睡眠状态。我自己也常这样,夜里睡觉很不安稳,总是半睡眠状态,“躺在床上”几个小时,似睡非睡,这样“躺”(即“半睡”)二、三、四个小时,就要完全醒来,醒来后思想起什么,就再也不能入睡,否则就要做梦,“似梦非梦”,都是白天里的情景,有的还是几十年前的人和事,但醒来后就几乎忘光。因此常半夜起来上网发稿。可不,我此刻就坐在电脑前打字呀!不过这也不大可能符合孟浩然《春晓》里写的情景,因为这位“平民”诗人一共只活了五十一岁;他写此诗也许还在他“春眠不觉晓”的青、中年。

老来睡眠少,一夜醒多次;再睡就做梦,不如写电脑。

Old men need very little sleep,

Wake up several times a night.

I’d rather write on computer

Than dream and dream in bed.

我一直这样认为:英语是外语的中国译者(当然我也包括在内),翻译中随时都会遇到语言问题,出现语言错误不足为怪。另外,先生翻译了那么多东西,我绝无意拿这两句译文否定先生的一切。何况我有关的评论也很可能有错或不妥,欢迎先生与网友批评指正。还是我早已写过的那句真心实意的话:我爱先生,更爱真理;我爱真理,也爱先生。我历来就是抱着这样的心情写评论文章的。

(五)

对于译文的语言问题,主要凭语感判断。但我对自己的英语语感实在没有把握,为了检查自己对许渊冲老的那两句译文的评论,我对till(until)的用法做了一些研究,把结果发给网友们,也请许渊冲老指正。

till(until)用作连词时(也可以用作介词)有如下特点:

连词till(until)连接的主句和从句中,两者的谓语一般用同样的时式。如果是叙述某具体过程,通常都用一般过去式,但有时从句的谓语用过去完成式(跟主句的一般过去式照应)。例如:

He lay till the sum was nearly up.

On and on he went, till he reached theoutskirt of the wood.

We danced and danced until a lot of them joined in.

I watched him until he disappeared from sight in the distance.

I did not begin work until he had gone.

He didn’t masrry until he was fifty.

I heard there was no age limit, that is, you could be a librarian until you died.

I accepted the motion that I would probably work until I dropped.

如果是叙述一般的、常见的现象,通常都用一般现在式,但有时从句的谓语用现在完成式(跟主句的一般现在式照应);或者主句的谓语用一般将来式或命令式(跟从句的一般现在式照应)。例如:

I propose waiting till the police get here.

You and I can do some sightseeing, till I go back to Cambrige.

Don’t promise Harry till we’ve had time to think about it.

We can decide nothihg until we know your views.

Give him no defintie answer util I ’ ve seen him.

I hope you won’t do anythig until we ‘ve all thought it over.

I cann’t say definitely until I see Ellis.

I’ll take no steps until you arrive.

从以上例句还可看到:主句谓语通常表示某一个可以延续较长时间(如work, wait等,谓语多为“肯定式”) 或多次发生的动作或状态(谓语多为“否定式”)。

从以上例句还可证明:until与till的词义与用法基本相同。但前者比后者常见,特别是当主句的谓语是否定式,until比till常见。另外,以until开头的从句可以放在主句前,表示“强调”;但till不能这样。之所以这样,是因为可以出现这样的强调句型: It was not until…that…例如:

It was not until I had read your letter that I understood the true state of affairs. (比较: I understood the true state of affairs until I had read your letter. )

It was not until I saw Margaret next morning, however, that I felt happy.

Until I was twenty - one I never missed atending night school four nights a week.

Not until the tenth serious accident occurred at the busy intersecton, did the Highway Department agree to install the four-way stop sigh.

以上例句绝大部分来自张道真先生编着的《现代英语用法词典》。这是他“经过了二十多年艰苦漫长的岁月”完成的。(详见1982年12月写的《前言》)。从那时起我就对他产生了由衷的敬意,我非常佩服他编着《现代英语用法词典》的精神、毅力与智慧,虽然至今我们彼此并无来往。

(六)

我从最近翻译的几首英语经典诗里补充几个例句,以进一步证明: till(until)前后不能用“过去式”(主句)与“现在式样”(从句)搭配。例句如下:

No one heeds 无人理会。

The light wind frets 微风吹拂

And drift the scrum 五月鲜花蓓蕾

Of May-blossom. 落英缤纷。

Till moorhen calls 红松鸡啼叫

Again. 二遍 (The Pond)

Stay stay,

Until the hasting day Has run

But to the even-song;

别忙走,别忙走,

直到匆忙的白日尽而

夜晚来临;(咏黄水仙)

And I will luve thee still, my dear,

Till a’ the seas go dry.

Till a’(=all) the seas go dry, my dear,

And the rocks melt wi ( =with ) the sun!

亲爱的姑娘,我永远爱你,

直到海枯石烂啊,

直到大海枯竭,

直到巨石熔化! (《一朵红红的玫瑰》)

We outgrow love like other things

And put it in the drawer,

Till it an antique fashion shows

Like costumes grandsires wore.

我们已经超过爱的年龄

爱情也像其他东西,

应该放进抽屉,

直到它成为古董,

像祖先穿过的衣服。

这里需要补充一点:在一般的文体里until比till常见,但在诗里Till 看来反而比until常见。我还读到这样一首诗,till 的用法更可借鉴:

John Lyly (1554 --- 1606)

Trico’s Song 百灵鸟歌唱

John Lyly

None but the lark so shrill and clear;

Now at heaven’s gates she clasps her wing,

The morn not waking till she sings.

Hark, hark.

只有百灵鸟在嘹亮地歌唱,

她在天门拍打翅膀,

在她歌唱以前,黎明不会到来。

听!听她歌唱!

头两行是一个复合句。 The morn not waking 是分词独立结构。这里是分词 waking ,不是过去式 woke 。

我再从我翻译的《飘》里寻找例句,以进一步证明:till(until)前后不能用“过去式”(主句)与“现在式样”(从句)搭配。我查了第一和第二章,只找到了三个例句:

“Yes, he can do it, but it takes Boyd time. He has to talk around in circles till Ma gets so confused that she gives up and tells him to save his voice for his law practice. But he ain’t had time to get good started yet. Why, I’ll bet you Ma is still so excited about the mew horse that she’ll never even realize we’re home again till she sits down to supper to-night and sees Boyd. And before supper is over she’ll be going strong and breathing fire. And it’ll be ten o’clock before Boyd gets a chance to tell her that it wouldn’t have been honourable for any of us to stay in college after the way the Chancellor talked to you and me. And it’ll be midnight before he gets her turned around to where she’s so mad at the Chancellor she’ll be asking Boyd why he didn’t shoot him. No, we can’t go home till after midnight. “是的,这个博德能办到,但是他需要时间呀。他不得不兜圈子,等到把妈说糊涂了,妈才会让步,才会叫他保护好嗓子去学律师。但是他现在还没来得及开好头哩。我敢打赌,妈此时还在为新买的马兴奋,一直要等到她今天晚上坐下来吃晚饭并且看见了博德,她才会想起咱们这次又被开除回家的事。晚饭还未吃完,她就会大发雷霆,大动肝火。要等到十点钟,博德才能找到机会向妈开口,说校长是怎样对咱俩谈话的,说咱们四人再待在学校实在不光彩。要等到半夜,博德才能把妈说说得晕头转向,把一肚子气出在校长身上,甚至会问博德为什么不向他开枪。不,不到半夜咱们是不能回家的。” Scarlett turned away from Mammy with studied nonchalance, thankful that her face had been unnoticed in Mammy’s preoccupation with the matter of the shawl. “No, I want to sit here and watch the sunset. It’s so pretty. You run get my shawl. Please, Mammy , and I’ll sit here till Pa comes home.” 思佳丽故意冷淡地转过身去,幸亏黑妈妈只顾披巾的事而没有注意到她的脸色。 “不,我想坐在这里看晚霞。它太美了。你跑去把我的披巾拿来。请,奶妈!( 1 )我在这里要坐到爸爸回来。” “So now ‘tis you wanting to go in,” he observed. “But here I’m going to stand till I’m understanding you. Now that I think of it, ‘tis strange you’ve been recently. Has he been trifling with you? Has he asked to marry you?” “No,” she said shortly. “Nor will he,” said Gerald. “现在是你要回家了,”他打量着。“但是我想在这里一直站到把你弄明白为止。现在我想起来了,你近来表现得有些奇怪。他是不是耍弄过你?他是不是向你要求过结婚?” “没有,”她简短地回答。 “他当然不会这样,”杰拉德说。北京翻译公司整理


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